Push for PORTER

On Dollymount Strand on a cold winter's night
I put on the hand brake and switched out the light
I looked at me bird and says I, "Are you right?"
Meself and the architect's daughter

But the sea, oh the sea, it crept up on me
And the water was rising up quite rapidly
Says I to the mot, "Get your hand off me knee
Can't you see we're surrounded by water?"

I turned on the ignition and put it in gear
Could I get it moving, lads? Oh, not a fear
Not if I was there for a whole bloody year
There was sand in the old carburetor

With water the car was soon filled to the brim
I said to the mot, "Dear, the chances are slim
So love, get them off you, we'll both have to swim."
So I let down the window and scarpered

So if ever you down to Dollymount Strand
Make sure that the tide's out and everything's grand
For a bird in the bush is worth two in the sand
Regardless of what you are after