Push for PORTER

I'll tell a tale of a jealous male and a maid of sweet sixteen
She was blond and dumb and she lived with her Mum
On the edge of Bethnal Green
She worked all week for a rich old Greek
Her old man was on the dole
And her one delight on a Friday night
Was to have a bit of rock and roll.

To my rit-fal-lal
To my titty-fal-lal
To my itty-bitty fal dal day

Then one fine day in the Month of May she found her big romance
He was smart and sleek, with a scar on his cheek
And a pair of drainpipe pants
And she thought with you, I could be so true,
Through all the years to come
For she loved the gay abandoned way
He chewed his chewing-gum.

It started well because he fell
for all her girlish charms
But he had some doubt when he caught her out
In someone else's arms
And he said, Look here, you know my dear,
This is going a bit too far
And he went quite white and he sloshed her right
In the middle of her cha-cha-cha.

So he went before a man of the law who said, This will not do
I've had about enough of this kind of stuff
As I want from the likes of you.
And she was peeved when he received
A longish term in clink
In a fit of pique she married the Greek
And now she lives in mink.